JAKE DE LEON MENDREZ

meron bang rules ang mainlab?

Si ursula ay isa kong matalik na kaibegan. Siya ang parati kong kaulayaw pag depress ako, pag wala ako makasama or kung wala na akong pera.  Madalas eh kami ang magkadamay sa mga panahon na wala na akong mapaglabasan ng sama ng loob sa malupet na mundo.

Minsan, niyaya nya ako magsimba. Medyo malapet ito sa tinutuluyan niya na boarding house sa Makati.

Jake: Baket hinde na lang tayo sa greenbelt chapel magcmba, para sosyal!?

Ursula: Eeeehhh...Ayaw ko, gusto ko d2 eh kasi crush na crush ko yung pare. kutsi kutsi....kinikilig pa siya nyan...

Jake: anlande mo! pati alagad ng Diyos - pinagdiskitahan?

Ursula: Eh vaket crush lang naman.... An gwapo kazi eh...

Jake: ayan makamundo ka! eh pano kung magkagusto sayo, eh di nasira mo ang debosyon nya. Hindi ka patawaren ni Lord nyan.

Ursula: magtigel ka nga! wala naman ako ginagawa na masama.

Jake: Asus, if I know pag nagmimisa - hindi ka nakikineg. kasi tulo laway mo sa pagtiteg! akala mo naman, hindi kita kilala. Eh pano nga yan pag nainlab sau?

Ursula: eh di papatulan ko..hahaha...joke..

Jake: ansama mo!~ ano nga kaya...mangumpisal ka, tapos sabihen mo-

Father, ako po'y nagkasala. Umiibeg po ako sa isang alagad ng Diyos. Masama po ba ang magmahal?

Hija, hindi masama ang magmahal. Sino ba ang alagad ng Diyos na tinutukoy mo? Ako ba?

wow..assuming si Father!....

Hija, hindi masama ang magmahal, eto ay natural lamang. Ito ay parte ng ating pagkatao. Ang pagibeg ay walang pinipile. Kung magmahal ka ng isang alagad ng Diyos - walang masama dun, ang maaring maging masama ay ang mga bagay na maari mong gawen na makakasira sayo at sa kanya.

Eh Father, hangang tingen lang naman po, no touch. Promise.

aba, aba at nagpaalam ka na kagad ha....

Nga pala, itago na lang naten ang pangalan ng pari na Eugene.

In fairness, may hitsura nga si Eugene, este si Father katulad ng kwento nya.

Paglabas namen ng simbahan - andun si Father, nakaabito pa at nagpiPR sa mga nagsimba. Nagpark boy pa nga si father habang inaasiste ang papalabas na sasakyan ng kapilya...Medyo masikep kasi ang parking.

Kami naman ni Ursula ay nasa bungad ng gate ng simbahan kung asan si Father.

Ui Ursula, baket hindi ka magpabless kay Father..uyyyyyyy...kutsi kutsi...haha

magtigel ka nga, shy ako eh....

pademure ka pa, upakan kita dyan...dali na...

yaw ko...ales na nga tayo...

kunware ka pa, eh ayaw mo naman umales...puro nakaw tingen ka...

ayun umales din kami, ng walang bless kay father...

Ursula: ang gwapoooooH!.

Jake: Ui wakeup call - si father yun..wag magdream BIG. Itigel ang pangarap na bitwin. Baka bukas lumuhod ang mga tala....(corny noh>?)

Ursula: Panira ka talaga sa mga dreams ko.

Jake: ako ang iyong konsensya......hahaha

Last week, I made a stupid mistake! It took me 36 hours to realized and accept that I made the stupid mistakes. I've been able to avoid doing it for 3 years until it came to me - I did it again.

You might be wondering . . . what is this stupid mistake?

Hmmmm . . . I walked out.

Before, I have this tendency to walk away from confrontation, or whenever I am pissed with someone. Rather than facing him/her, I walk away. When Im angry I walk away without telling what occurred to me.

Dati Im blaming the full moon for this mood swings, but later on I find out its in my nature and I can change it. Maybe I just realized I need to. Specially when I start working.

I used to walk away even in my previous college jobs. I worked before for Jollibee as a counter crew. I walked away one time, I left my long line of customers. Why ? Because I suppose to leave by 11am because of my class. My Manager is asking me to stay since my shift replacement havent arrived and Lunch Time is about to come. Expecting peak hours for lunch, he asked me to stay a little longer until my replacement arrive. 12nn came, and there all the customers cramming to make their orders. I was so pissed off in the situation since I didnt agree with my Manager. What I did is I walked out! I went to get my things for school. I changed in my uniform, and walked infront of the counter area. There I saw all my customers shouting and looking for me!

CustomerGuy: Where is the crew HERE?!!! (shouting)

Its too late to stand my ground. I walked away! going to school. You might have an idea what happened the next day. It made me realized our actions is equivalent to consequences we need to deal sooner or later.

Going back to my stupid mistake . . .

I was insisting something with my close friend to do. She was not willing to do it. I was irritated because what Im asking is the sole reason why I am there. I went directly to that place from Makati. I ask someone to bring my things to our house so I can be there. Yet, I felt I was taken for granted. I was angry! But I didnt showed it to them. Rather than prioritize what we are about to do, they choose to watch volleyball! I parted, and walked away without bidding goodbye or even tell them Im leaving.

I dont want confrontation. I said my part. I was irritated.

Walked Away - thats a stupid mistake I made, now the person is NOT talking to me until now. Shucks! Hope she'll call me agad or else we wont be OK ever again. ( mapride kasi ako . . . siya una tumawag!)

Kelan ba natin malaman na hindi na natin mahal ang isang tao?

Sobrang mahirap yata malaman. Ganun na lang na yun kadali - You just felt na wala nang sparks or faded na ang pagpapasweet nyo sa isa't isa? Yung hindi na kayo mabenta sa mga park, sa mga sulok ng school, sa madilim na parte ng sinehan. Or baka naman when your no longer looking forward na makita siya after your Bio, or after your work.

The art of letting go. Kelan ka dapat magsabi na " I need more space" or " Give me time for myself" Kelan nauso ang mga reasons na ganito. Nakakabaliw mainlab, pero ang ma FALL OUT of LOVE, mahirap iexplain.

I can still recall my ex. Sabi niya nung naging kami na, meron lang siya time frame until when kami magigini kami ( labo noh ). Hindi ko naman siya masisi, kasi we want to do more things then and alam namin na we will meet other people. Kumbaga hindi pa sure na kami talaga. Pero after almost 2 years, sabi niya - Ngayun, I dont want to it to end anymore. I know I made the right choice ng pinili ko na mahalin ka" Sobrang mahal ko toh. Demmit! It need to end so soon - Eh pano, hindi naman pwede pilitin ang PUSO na pumintig uli for someone. Hindi naman deremote control na pwede mo iplay uli after mo siya naSTOP.

Pano ba? Kapag naglet go ka ba, nagiging masaya ka ba? gagaan ba ang dibdib mo. As per my experience - HINDI NAMAN! Although, it would be unfair naman to keep something na WALA na db. Specially for her. Lalo na if you value her.

Tok Tok Tok. May new Girl na kumakatok sa puso ko. Pero hindi naman sure if kelan magopen. I always try to convice myself na Im ready for another relationship. Pero pag magisa na lang ako - I realized na READY na ba talaga ako?

Pwede ba ipa TUNE UP ang puso? Pwede ba ipa checkup? or ipa upgrade parang cellphone. Para better performance, more flexible, more lasting sa pagmamahal? Pwede ba magchange OIL para hindi nagagasgas?

Ewan ko. Ewan ko. Kaya nga nakaBLOG eh. Nalilito ako. Demmit talaga!

Calling all First Asia Institute Alumni Organization members.

What: 1st FAI Alumni Meeting

When: July 26, 2008 4:00pm

Where: First Asia Institute of Technology & Humanities

Why: Discussion of Alumni Matters

For any questions, please contact FAIAO President - Em Bercansil 09065537280 or FAIAO VP for Communications - Cyndee Sanchez 09223480363.

Attendance is EXPECTED! Dont dissapoint US!

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

Whoaaah! I only had less than 10 hours sleep for the past 5 days.

I feel really tipsy, yet I cant sleep since I still have lots of things to do for Fiscal Year End. Sa sobrang pagod ko, I realized its been a while since I posted something here. Kaya e2 trying hard to do something . . .

3 weeks na yata ako di umuuwi samen. Cgurado na miss na miss na ako ng mga aso namen. Haha ( aso lang nakaalala? ).

Naramdaman mo na ba na you havent done your real purpose here? Yung tipong meron kang guts instincts na your here to do something - you just can't figure out what is it? hirap iexplain noh - I encounter this feeling, at di siya madali db, you feel uneasy - para bang may kulang.

wala na ako maisep . . .

Restricted - madame ako neto sa work station ko. I use this to tag my Year End accruals request.

I hope I can do the same to personal issues, I dont want other people to bug in.

Sana - we can raise a flag that says - LEAVE ME ALONE!

kaya lang wala eh.

Dont ask me why . . . .

I love Seth Ezekiel! Bhie gave him to me today as we celebrated our 2nd Monthsarry.

Its been 5, 345,777.25 seconds since she said Yes. I love you so much Bhie!

I woke up suddenly in the middle of the night. I gazed out the window seeing only darkness. I looked around the room. I saw unfamiliar things.

What am I doing here?

This is not my bed. This is not my pillow. This is not my room.

Where am I?

I saw a photo at the side cabinet. It’s me, but Im with someone. She looks familiar, yet I can’t remember her face then. Im so confused. The bathroon door opened.

Sorry, did I wake you up?

No. I said.

I just checked the kids. They are both sound asleep.

Kids?

Are you alright? Yes, Michael and Gabriela. They really wanted to play with you last night. But I told them you’re really exhausted from work.

Im worried about you honey. Your really tired and stressed out. I think you need a break.

Do I?

Yes. Whats happenning to you? Your acting really strange.

Where am I?

Ok . . . your making me nervous. Where else can you be? aside from our house.

Are you my wife? (confused)

 Honey ! stop fooling around. Its not funny anymore.

How long have we been married? Again?

3 years now. Why?

Its not funny anymore. Stop it. I want you out of the bed, take a shower since you smell like last night and please . . please go check the kids and kiss them good night. Okie ?

Alright . .

Im terribly confused. Am I dreaming? Is this some kind of a joke? I walk slowly toward the other door. I opened it, and I saw 2 figures. One is a boy. Fair curly hair, white complexion and a chubby looking kid. Then on the other side of the room is a little girl who hugged her doll so tight as if its her daughter. She smiles silently and I can see her innocence even in the darkness.

I felt something.

Like I want to hug them so tight, and kiss them. I feel I’ve been so far from them for a very long time. Before I can see it – Im already embracing them one by one, and kissing their forehead.

I feel so attached to them, like They are my own.

But something is not right. I don’t remember being married or having a child? But what is this?

I walked towards the door, then suddenly the lady opened it. She smiled, then kissed me. A very passionate kiss. I was so helpless not to answer back. I kissed her, It feels like I missed her so much. Her lips feels right, as if it made to kiss mine.

She put her hands around me, and embrace me.

Im so lucky to have you.

I wish that you don’t need to go back.

Go back where?

We don’t need to talk about that now. I just want to kiss and hug you. I miss you so much. Don’t you miss me?

Ahhmm . . . Obcourse I do.

We went to bed and make love to eachother. I cant explain how it begin, but everything just happened like it was supposed to happen.

The next morning, I wake up and I was hoping that everything was normal again.

I slowly opened my eyes – then I saw two faces infront of me, smiling at me.

Good morning Dad! How is your sleep? Are you still tired? We made breakfast for you. They are both smiling sweetly at me. I cant help but to smile back.

I said, Good morning sweethearts – Im sorry about last night. Dad was really tired. But I woke up at the middle of the night to check on you two.

I told you, Dad went to see us last night. I felt he kiss me – the young girl said.

Alright you won.

I keep on staring on both of them, and enjoying every single word they talk about while eating the breakfast they prepared for me. Mostly are fresh fruits like watermelon. Pineapple, melon, papaya, grapes, and mango shake.

Did you prepared all of these?

Yeah, Gabriella took care of the fruits, while I did the shake. How does it taste?

It taste really really good. I was very impressed and full J

I told you he will love it – the young girl said.

Ok, you won again. He was smiling when he said it.

All of a sudden, they hug me extra tight. And said “ We love you Daddy”

I feel really happy, weird but with absolute happiness.

Then suddenly  . . . Everything went black

The flight stewardess is waking me up. We are about to transfer plane going to Dubai. It’s a really weird dream. Very vivid and very confusing. Who is that woman, I cant recall her face anymore.

Im just happy I saw my 2 kids, hopefully I will see them in the future. J

I feel super frustrated!

Its been almost a month now since we started to finish a tax audit requirement. Its been really difficult since we dont really understand what happened on those year. I can't help but blog this - Sorry - I dont have any other outlet. I need to dispose these thoughts or I can't proceed.

I really need a break. I feel exhausted now. I need to complete all accounts before the end of Thursday. I need to leave Makati by 5pm to go back to Batangas. Aside from that is the preparation for Monthend closing. Its really tiring but I know I can make it. I always beat the odds, no matter what.

Its just the timing of them arriving all at the same time. I hope our team will pass this limelights soon.

If you read this, please wish us luck! :)

Respectfully

JakeMendrez

It was difficult for us not to go home to Batangas last weekend, but I need to stay to finish some work with my team. Baby decided not to go back also since we haven't really spent quality time this week.

I can't recall when was the last time I attended a mass. One thing for sure, its been a while! We took the advantage of being here together to schedule a date with Him and give thanks for all the blessing He gave us, specially allowing us to meet the TRUE HAPPINESS we've been waiting for so long.

Despite my call time of 11:30 (which I didnt meet because I really need to take a bath because of the heat!) I arrived beyond 12pm. Thankfully, she was not so mad at me when I arrived.

Mesmerized with her pink dress - I can only made the comment " Mukhang mapapa away yata ako today ah" She just smiled with a reply " Mukha nga!". She was really gorgeous . . . as in!

We went on our way to Glorietta. We were both starving and hurriedly look for the first restaurant in sight. Fortunately Pizza Hut was just infront where the taxi driver brought us. It was also our first time to eat here. We are both excited to make another compilations of kulet moments together here.

We took our seats, sitting besides eachother. I just noticed a lot of people are staring at us (actually em not certain if Im part of it - dammet them!). She's always center of attraction! <getting used to it>

One more nakaw tingen - at tatamaan ka na sakin! I just said to her. This is when I caught the other guy from the table not far from us keep looking at her with her GF sitting infront of her - mind you. Focus ka nga!

As usual, Baby have this unusual appetite, and I just can't help but to be affected. Its really contagious. I never been so starved in my whole life. Makulet na part is we all the carbs - pizza, pasta, paella, we have green salad though. We have melrose and pepsi as well for drinks. Their mushroom soup is SUPERV by the way. I started designing her plate with the food we have. Its really cute, and she appreciated it. we even took photos, kulet nga eh.

Another funny thing is, sinusubuan ko siya ng food! and vice versa. We just asked ourselves, why dont we just exchange plates? where is the fun eating from your own plate anyway? Also, She always get the big spoon of paella or the enourmous serving of pasta. I so love seeing her in each gazed.

I keep on touching her hands. It feels so right and reassuring. I feel calm and relaxed. I really feel guilty. This month is a very crazy and busy for my team. And I was glad, that she keep on understanding me. Marami na ako atraso sa baby ko - kelangan bumawe and make her smile once more. Thats the goal! To make this date not the normal date we have when were busy.

This date is different!

She is still not feeling well today. I visited her yesterday and brought a bunch of fruits to make her better. I first went with her to buy her medicines after that since we are really full. We looked for a starbucks - although we first went to Bo's Coffee but there's no couch! which we both love by the way. We went in starbucks in rustan but its so hot there. We hate hot places.

Then were on our way to 6750, we realized theres a starbucks in Cinema area in Glorietta - so we hurriedly walked to it. We then decided to watch a movie since its still 2:35 when we arrived there. I think mass doesnt start before 3pm. We choose Indiana Jones. After buying a 3:25 ticket since the 2:35 show is already starting and we dont want to cramm - we go ahead and take a sip of hot latte.

Baby dont really like coffee before, but because of me - she love it now (No Choice?). She also took her medicine here. We keep on staring at the infants outside the window hoping we will have many of them someday. We keep on arguing which should come first. I really want a juniour. But whatever God give us, we will accept it with all happiness.

I also said "Dapat lalaki para may magtatangol sa mga girls!". She just laugh!

We left starbucks and catched our movie. It was a pretty amazing movie since it was based on Steven Spielberg book. What made it more amazing is because Im watching it with the most GORGEOUS WOMAN in the planet.

While watching - I just cant help but smile everytime I see Baby laugh at the scenes of the movie. Its like everything was so right. Everything are in their proper order. Everything are in placed. As if the planet at moving in proper alignments. I never been happier before or even felt this way. Im just glad she is here with me. No need to utter anything - She just make me happy each time.

I felt Unexplainable happiness - how in the world can you explain it?

After the movie which was almost 530, we went straight to Greenbelt Chapel where we decided to attend our First Ever Mass together. I havent really got the chance to Thank Him for giving her to me.

I closed my eyes, vow my head and closed my hands together.

     Dear Lord, - Salamat po ng sobra for entrusting her to me. I feel so blessed.

     Please guide us and take control of our relationship for we will never be lost

     in your directions. Please keep her from all harm. I love her so much."

She is still deep in prayer when I opened my eyes. I just love everything about her. Every strands of her hair, every inch of her reminds me that I've been so blessed. I wanted to hug her - pero nasa mass kami so pigel muna. We offer peace to eachother and we kissed in front of Our Lord. It sealed the silent promise we made.

Another surprise is we saw our friend from our school who talked about passion on how to serve for God by means of serving other people. She did this infront of hundreds of people who attended the mass. We approached her and greated her. She offered us to join her to Hongkong on November and we just looked at eachother, and we already know what to do. Funny how we understand eachother without even asking or saying anything - maybe were just really inlove and we feel the beat of eacother's hearts.

After the mass, we are both starving, AGAIN! so we went back to Glorietta to look for food. Another first for us is to eat in Kenny Rogers Roaster. I ordered Healthy plate + extra rice while she chosed grilled salmon with a comment

          "Dapat meron ka fish sa diet mo kasi you need protein to build muscles" - Pagalitan ba ako?

She also ordered mango shake,  and a straberry shake for me.

We keep on our kuletan even during the meal. We have roasted chicken, green salad, muffins, rice, fruit shakes, grilled fish, and fresh fruits. It was the best meal ever. Every instances are memories to treasure. After we finished the meal, while drinking the shakes - we then proceed to a pictorial. Were both so much PhotoAddict that we take shots of all movements, all angles and all funny stuffs with the straws, the forks, the muffins, the shades, the bangs and many more.

Haaaayyy . . . This date was really fulfilling. I know we dont have much time together during weekdays, and Im so glad there is a Sunday to fill up the gaps we had. It might be short, yet its something I can cherished as long as Im breathing . . .

Thanks Baby for making my Sunday memorable and my whole Lyf extra SPECIAL!

I will let go . . .

of all my insecurities and doubts.

I will trust you more now.

Thanks for giving full colors to my life.

Mwaaah !  . . .